This months topic is a tough but important one.
Romance & Parenting
First off I feel like I need to say that we definitely are by no means experts in this department.
Romance and parenting are two things that have always been very intertwined in our marriage. We were married in mid August of 2007 decided we would waste no time in starting a family and found out we were expecting in early October about 7 weeks after our wedding. We didn't have much of a "honeymoon" phase.
Over the past 7.5 years we have discovered a few things that work for our family.
Today I wanted to share some of those with you.
* Priorities: God first, husband second, children next. Keeping these in check has a HUGE affect on the quality of our marriage. Especially when it comes to the kids. It is so easy to move them into that # 1 or #2 spot.
* Be creative with finding ways to spend time together: This past Valentines we celebrated at Chick Fil-a. That may not scream romance to a lot of people but we ate together as a family the kids went to play and we had a nice quiet conversation. Sometimes you have to look for the unexpected ways to date your spouse. As our girls have grown older and a bit more independent we are learning to take advantage of these little moments.
* Solo Time away: As rejuvenating as a date night can be some times Russ telling me to get out of the house is even more helpful. Giving your spouse a break speaks volumes of love and sacrifice.
* Hugging: I think people underestimate what a good hug can do. Taking the time to hug and not feel like you have to be rushed is always so good for my heart. Best part is who cares if the kids are watching.
Side note: I feel pretty certain I may have married the best hugger ever.
* Love Notes: This has looked several different ways over the years. Pieces of paper, dry erase boards, mirrors, texts, notes in lunch boxes, I love when Russ leaves me a note. The unexpected affirmation of him thinking about me always makes me smile.
* Favorite things: Picking up a favorite candy bar, beverage, making a favorite meal, watching a favorite movie. You get the point. Something to say I know you and I'm thinking about you. I do this for my kids all the time. Why not my husband to (This kind of throws me back to my first point, priorities).
* I love you: Three little words I never want to take for granted. In a world where sometimes it is so loud, busy, chaotic and just down right exhausting may I always find the time to proclaim my love for my guy.
How do you mix romance & parenting?
Now it's your turn. What are you posting about today?
Thanks for joining us!
Thanks for the post! Love the ideas of adding romance to my marriage while still parenting. It's in the small stuff! I agree with you!!
ReplyDeleteThese are such great tips! Getting out and spending alone time together....aah, can't wait!
ReplyDeleteThat is great that you were able to have quiet conversation at Chick Fil-a! It goes to show how your attitude can affect this. You could have chosen to be crabby & think that it was a lame outing for Valentine's Day. OR you could appreciate that you were able to have some "alone" quiet time at the restaurant. Wonderful attitude!
ReplyDeleteWe have a restaurant in our neighbor hood that has toys & books for kiddos to play with. We love going for breakfast there as the kids can be entertained. Although my one year-old doesn't last long being contained with the toys...:) But my 3 year old could play for hours!
Those small little things can make such a big difference!
ReplyDeleteThese are great tips! Keeping your marriage strong isn't always easy with kids, but it's definitely worth the effort. One of my favorite things I heard from someone was "Be kind to your spouse - they're the one that stays after kids leave."
ReplyDeleteI loved this post!!!!! Number 1...AMEN!
ReplyDeleteGreat advice! The order of priorities is so important! It can be easy as a mom to get those out of whack. Love this!
ReplyDeleteEnjoyed this and a great reminder!
ReplyDeleteAlways a great reminder! Sometimes our greatest dates are the simple ones.
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading! It can be so tricky to figure out but the benefits are definitely worth the effort.
ReplyDeleteHave a great day!
Thanks friend!
ReplyDeleteI remember the years of wondering what alone time was :). Those are the crazy years but they are so special and fun to.
Thank you! I always try to be an optimist... key word, TRY :).
ReplyDeleteThat sounds like such a fantastic place. I wish more places catered to parents with young kids like that.
Yes they do! I also think the little things mean even more to me than some of the more grand gestures do. I am a simple kind of gal.
ReplyDeleteHave a great day!
Thanks friend. Yes #1 seems to be the key, if it isn't happening.... everything else just falls apart.
ReplyDeleteThank you!
ReplyDeleteIt is literally a DAILY struggle to keep my priorities straight. Maybe even hourly. So easy to get so distracted.
Have a great day!
Hehe!!! YES! I almost included a quote that was very similar to that in this post haha! So much truth in that.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for reading!
ReplyDeleteHave a great day!
so true! Sometimes it's hard to remember that, when you have little ones. Because they have to depend on you for everything! Thank you for the reminder!
ReplyDeleteI couldn't possibly agree more. Less to get distracted by maybe?
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading!
The solo time is so crucial. While we don't get to have that kind of time nearly as much as we'd like, when we do we really savor that time together.
ReplyDeleteAnd the little notes. I love surprising Scott by slipping a little note in with his lunch on occasion. :)
I completely agree with all of the things that you said! And like you said, Valentine's Day, we went to a movie and had in n out. Maybe not the most romantic dinner choice, but we were together, sans child, and we had a great time. Sometimes as a parent, you just have to be all around creative and make the most of your time.
ReplyDeleteIt is so hard to get away, especially when the kids are super young. And if one parent leaves they other can feel like they are sinking but it is so crucial to get away alone and together to keep sanity.
ReplyDeleteIt is so fun. Russ always comes home for lunch now so it is much harder but I do manage on occasion!
It is SO easy, like I have to remind myself hourly maybe even more often some days:). We do to, once a month doesn't feel nearly as often as I would like but even that can be hard to work out some times.
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading and for saying hello!
Yes, Yes, Yes! Parenting requires creative skills on all kinds of levels!
ReplyDeleteWe don't make nearly enough time for just us. Everything is work, Xavier, etc. I have tried really hard to set aside at least one day a month for just us this year. So far so good :) I love my guy! And I could really care less what we do together, as long as we are together doing it :)
ReplyDeleteAmen! It is so, so hard to carve out that time together. Even one date a month can sometimes feel impossible. I hope your able to keep it up. Time away is always so good.
ReplyDeleteTotal struggle for me to not let Aria slip into that number one spot. And, you are right we do so many special things for our kids it is easy to forget to do something special for our fellas. I mean, I almost forgot to make Chris a valentine card! I was wrapped up with little themed activities with Aria. But, then we all were felled with the sickicks and Aria and I didn't finish the card until a few days after Valentine, but close =)
ReplyDeleteIt is SO hard. I think mostly because kids are just verbally more needy and they don't let you forget those needs either. So glad you didn't forget. I hope everyone is starting to feel better friend. The sickies just plain stink.
ReplyDelete